No, I haven’t lost my mind completely, just partially, watching Oklahoma’s elephants acting like Okie donkeys did for decades. By that I mean things have gone so well for the Party of Lincoln here in the 46th state that they now can’t seem to stop and enjoy their success; rather they prefer to participate in some intramural sparring between a very conservative incumbent by the name of Sen. James Lankford arrayed against two primary challengers, impossibly further to his right; the two perched out there in Crazyland with Genghis Khan are preacher Jackson Lahmeyer and state Sen. Nathan Dahm, both of the Tulsa area.
Against these Amigos of the Apocalypse is newly announced Democratic candidate Jason Bollinger, an Oklahoma City attorney with impeccable credentials except for one small detail.
First, the good news. He is a graduate of Merritt High School in far western Oklahoma, earned an associate degree from Southwestern Oklahoma State University’s Sayre campus as well as accounting and law degrees from the University of Oklahoma.
However, even if his surname was Einstein he would still lose because there will be a “D” behind it on the ballot which means, because of straight party voting, he’ll be 40 points down before any votes are counted at all.
About five or six states still have straight party voting and Oklahoma also has closed Republican primaries and runoffs. Democrats invited Independents to cast their votes with the Party of Jefferson just a few years ago and many now do.
Oh, I almost forgot. Lankford’s big sin, as well as that of Senator-For-Too-Long James Inhofe, is pretty straightforward. They voted to seat the winner of the presidential race, one Joe Biden, during Jan. 6 congressional session, as required by our United States Constitution.
Apparently it’s not good enough that arch-conservative Lankford was going to vote not to do that until the looney tunes from throughout the country came to the Capitol disguised as tourists but ended up causing the deaths of four officers and injured more than 163 others. Oh, and they torn up the place pretty good and, worst of all, stole some of Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s beer stash. I’ll bet it was Sierra Nevada by brand.
Sounds similar to the movie Casablanca when sycophantic Police Chief Captain Renault arrives at Rick’s Nightclub and inquires where the hootch is. He, at least, was gentlemanly about it, whereas our current day guzzlers popped a top or two right in Madam Speaker’s digs just off the House of Representatives floor.
These new Republicans sure know how to party.