BY KAREN WEBB
Deliver me from the trumped up “War on Christmas” crusaders. Got another war declaration on Facebook recently. “It’s NOT Happy Holidays. It’s Merry Christmas. Share if you agree.” Agree with what? That anyone saying Happy Holidays hates Jesus?
I’ll bet the religious rightwingers are really PO’d at Target again this year because of that commercial with the “That’s my kind of holiday thing.” Here they go again provoking the self-righteous to wrath.
Holiday, which comes from Holy Day, is a dirty word.
I hope a few of the “Merry Christmas or Else Army” are a little PO’d at their Eternal Nitwit, Saint Sarah, from the House of Palin saying she just loves the commercialization of Christmas and she isn’t really fond of the Pope, not that the Defending Christmas Army would be fond of him, either.
I hope they are upset with her, but they probably aren’t. He, the Pope, keeps trying to keep his vow of poverty which isn’t easy at the Vatican and for that putting the poor first, judge not lest ye be judged, love thy neighbor stuff he keeps advocating. He seems to actually care about “the least of these.”
He would care more about The Waltons, aka John Boy’s Waltons, than Sarah’s “You Just Can’t Have Too Much Tinsel or Too Many Twinkle Lights or Barbies or Star Wars figures” Waltons of Bentonville. You know the guys who swear vows of poverty for their employees every time they have someone else stamp their names on a paycheck.
The Waltons who force their employees to gather together to do cheers to honor them every morning. The valued employees who qualify for SNAP even if they work 60 or 70 hours a week, which they aren’t allowed to do because then they might have to pay overtime.
The let’s say thank you this Thanksgiving by doing away with a minimum wage or the idea of paying a living wage kind of Waltons. You know they wouldn’t want their employees to have a paycheck they can live on or even buy things in the store they work in without the help of food stamps.
I can see every old time preacher I ever met rolling over in his grave. The kind of preacher you called a success by the number of people he helped and not the amount of money he brought in. The kind who taught if you had more than you need you should share.
They would have stuffed Sarah’s mouth full of red and green glittery tissue paper, taped it shut, slapped a bright bow on it and mailed her to the North Pole in the hope that Santa might pray for her eternal soul.
I remember the time when the over-commercialization of Christmas was something Jesus would not do or want his followers to do.
The Philippines just got wiped off the map and all Saint Sarah can talk about is denying people health care and food stamps while promoting the “shop ’til you drop” and call it a charitable deduction Christmas cheer.
“No,” Palin responded, “what I’m saying is we need to protect the heart of Christmas and not let an angry atheist armed with an attorney, as Scrooge, tell us that we can’t celebrate traditional faith in America. We have a constitutionally protected right to celebrate faith and Christmas is a part of that.”
I think she is calling anyone who says Happy Holidays or Seasons Greetings an angry atheist or the minion of an angry atheist.
And Sarah, don’t you go talking about Scrooge – it’s one of my favorite holiday movies because Scrooge actually gets the “put the cheer in Christmas” idea, even if it does take scaring the bejeebers out of him to get the point across.
At least Scrooge eventually sees the error of his ways and gets some health care for Tiny Tim and food for the rest of the Cratchetts and doubles Bob’s salary.
There is no way that would happen in Tea Party Land. Tea Party Land promotes the kind of party the Mad Hatter throws in Alice In Wonderland where no one actually gets anything, even tea.
“Clean cup, clean cup, move down, move down.”
By the way, don’t bother watching the rest of Sarah’s endless, nonsensical mutterings to Matt Lauer. She still can’t deliver her own talking points without sounding like an idiot.
And to all of you needing to share the “Merry Christmas Or You’re An Angry Atheist” greeting, keep it to yourself and please don’t think I hate you or Jesus when I answer, “Happy Holidays and I won’t be sharing this.”
WWJD? Ruin a friend’s Hanukkah or whatever else they celebrate? I hope not.
– Karen Webb lives in Moore, OK and is a frequent contributor to The Oklahoma Observer